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Cynicopedia
Systemic AbsurditiesEuphemism

Convenience Fee

kun-VEEN-yuns feenoun

DiagnosisAcute, unavoidable

What it means

A charge added for the convenience of the company, passed on to you, on the grounds that you had no alternative.

What it actually means

We are charging you for the till.

How it is used in a sentence

"There is a two pound booking fee. For a booking. That I made."

Filed under

Systemic Absurdities — Prices, platforms and institutions that were designed this way and would prefer you assumed otherwise.

Euphemism — The phrase hides something specific. We decode it.


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Related entries

Dynamic Pricing

Systemic Absurdities

dy-NAM-ik PRY-singnounEuphemism

Charging different people different amounts for the same thing, described as responsiveness rather than as finding out what you will pay.

Real meaning

The price is whatever you will tolerate right now.

The Loyalty Tax

Systemic Absurdities

thuh LOY-ul-tee taksnounCoinage

The surcharge paid for not shopping around, applied to everybody who assumed that staying would eventually be rewarded.

Real meaning

New customers get the discount. Existing ones fund it.