I Hope You Are Well
eye hohp yoo ar welphrase
DiagnosisContagious, harmless
What it means
A mandatory opening ritual whose sincerity is inversely proportional to the size of the favour that follows it.
What it actually means
I have not thought about you once, and I am about to ask for something.
How it is used in a sentence
"I hope you're well! Quick one, could you review this by Friday?"
Filed under
Business Bafflegab — Language engineered so that nothing is ever anyone’s fault and no decision is ever final.
Bafflegab — The phrase means nothing. We are ridiculing it.
Related entries
Per My Last Email
Business Bafflegabper my last EE-maylphraseEuphemism
A phrase establishing, for the record, that you already said this, were ignored, and will be remembering it.
Real meaningI am building a file on you.
Quick Question
Business Bafflegabkwik KWES-chunnounBafflegab
A preamble that guarantees the exchange will be neither quick nor, strictly speaking, a question.
Real meaningI am about to take twenty minutes you had allocated to something else.